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If You Really Loved Me

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Gm Dmaj#5/Gb
If you really loved me the way you say you do
Bb/F Gm/E
If you love me half as much as I love you
Cm7/Eb Bb
You would pluck a planet from the sky
A D
You’d use a star to dot the “i”
... A D Gm
When their love for one another is true
Doo doo doo
.. A D
But shirking challenges is not what love
Eb
Is all about
D Eb
Love is not all wine and roses
D Eb
Sometimes it’s handcuffs and cheese
C/E F
No-one said love is for free
Am/E
And if you agree with that
Cm/Eb D7 Gm
You’ll sing me passages from the koran wearing nothing but your Bob the Builder hat
Dmaj#5/Gb
To the tune of waltzing Matilda
Dm/F Gm/E Eb/F F E / / /
I just love the combination of islam, nationalism and buil--der
Am
Because I need you
Emaj#5/Ab
Like a tick needs a tock
C/G
Like bananas need pyjamas
D7/Gb
Like a nun needs cock
Dm7/F C
But if you want to put your love for me first
B E
You wouldn’t go through childbirth
Am Emaj#5/Ab
You’d agree to adopt so that you could stay thin
C/G D7/Gb
We’ll get a Chinese kid, it could teach us Mandarin
Dm7/F C
And communists don’t make as much noise
B E Am G
And they’re really good at sharing their toys
Cm
Because I dig you
Gmaj#5/B
Like an Aussie digs pies
Eb/Bb
Like Born-Agains dig Jesus
F7/A
Like Jesus dug guys
Ab Eb
If you loved me unconditionally
D G Ab
Like letting me video you while you wee
G Cm
Assuming there’s nothing worth watching on TV