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The Good Book

Chords by mikeyberman

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Bb                                   F              
Life is like an ocean voyage and our bodies are the ships
C                                    A            Dm    Dm/C
And without a moral compass we would all be cast adrift
      Bb                           F
So to keep us on our bearings, the Lord gave us a gift
C7                                    C
And like most gifts you get, it was a book

  F                              Bb
I only read one book, but it's a good book, don't you know
  C7                                                F
I act the way I act because the Good Book tells me so
     F               F7/Eb            Bb/D             Bbm/D
If I wanna known how to be good, it's to the Good Book that I go
         C7                            F
'Cos the Good Book is a book and it is good and it's a book

I know the Good Book's good because the Good Book says it's good
I know the Good Book knows it's good because a really good book would
You wouldn't cook without a cookbook and I think it's understood
You can't be good without a Good Book 'cos it's good and it's a book
And it is good for cookin'

Dm                                      A
I tried to read some other books, but I soon gave up on that
    Bb                                 F              C
The paragraphs ain't numbered and they complicate the facts
  A                                    Dm
I can't read Harry Potter 'cos they're worshipping false gods and that
    G                                 C
And Dumbledore's a poofter and that's bad, 'cos it's not good

Morality is written there in simple white and black
I feel sorry for you heathens, got to think about all that
Good is good and evil's bad and goats are good and pigs are crap
You'll find which one is which in the Good Book, 'cos it's good
And it's a book, and it's a book

I had a cat, she gave birth to a litter
The kittens were adorable and they made my family laugh
But as they grew they started misbehavin'
So I drowned the little fuckers in the bath
When the creatures in your care start being menaces
    G                                   C
The answers can be found right there in Genesis!
        D
Chapter 6, Verse 5-7!

G
Swing your partner by the hand
C
Have a baby if you can
D
But if the voices your head

Say to sacrifice your kid
G
To satiate your loving God's
C
Fetish for dead baby blood
D
It's simple faith, the Book demands

So raise that knife up in your hand!

  F                                          Bb
Before the Good Book made us good, there was no good way to know
     C                                                    F
If a thing was good or not that good or kind of touch and go

So God decided he'd give writing allegoric prose a go
And so he wrote a book and it was generally well-received

    Bb                               F              C
The Telegraph said, "This God is reminiscent of the Norse."
    Bb                                 F                  C
The Times said, "Kind of turgid, but I liked the bit with horses."
    A                                Dm
The Mail said, "Lots of massacres, a violent tour de force.
       G                                  C
If you only read one book this year, then this one is a book
          D
And it is good, and it's a book!"

Swing your daughter by the hand
But if she gets raped by a man
And refuses then to marry him
Stone her to death!

   Em                                      B                                       
If you just close your eyes and block your ears
         C                          G                 D
To the accumulated knowledge of the last two thousand years
     B                                   Em
Then morally, guess what? You're off the hook
          A                                D
And thank Christ you only have to read one book

Dm
Just because the book's contents
     A
Were written generations hence
Dm
By hairy desert-dwelling gents
A
Squatting in their dusty tents
Em
Just because what Heaven said
B
Was said before they'd leavened bread
Em
Just 'cos Jesus couldn't read
B
Doesn't mean that we should need
C
When manipulating human genes
G
To alleviate pain and fight disease
C
When deciding whether it's wrong or right
G
To help the dyin' let go of life
D
Or stop a pregnancy when it's

Just a tiny blastocyst
B                                      Em
There's no reason why we should take a look
D            C
At any other book
G/B
But the Good Book
A
'Cause it's good

And it's a book
D
And it's a book

And it's quite good!


G                G7/F
Good is good and evil's bad
C/E                      Cm/E
And kids get killed when God gets mad
D
And you'd better take a good look
       G            D G
At the Good Book